"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want"
-Psalm 23:1-
It all boils down to one simple question: Do I find contentment in the fact that I am in the will of the Father...or do I want more because that is that not enough for me?
As Matt and I were reading through Psalm 23 together the other day I was immediately convicted by all of the things that I want. I was convicted because I began to realize that Christ is not my shepherd. I realized that since we have moved here I've been finding myself wanting. A LOT. I want my hair to look a certain way. I want a rug for the the bedroom. I want more hand towels for the bathroom. I want a bread maker. I want an air conditioner. I want new summer clothes because it's so hot....sadly, I could keep going. I was convicted as I realized my lack of contentment. Why have I become so discontent? Because Christ is not my shepherd.
I keep thinking that if my hair would only be a little less curly, or if we had a rug in the bedroom or more hand towels...if I only had a new summer dress...then I might be happy.
It's almost embarrassing to admit it. To write it. To say it out loud, it seems so silly and so obviously "unchristian" of me. But there it is. I've been struggling to trust the Lord and the result is my being discontent. If Christ were my shepherd, I would not want. It's that simple.
So again the question remains...regardless of situation or circumstances, regardless of what I think I "need"...Can I find contentment, or even joy, in the simple truth that I know I am in the will of the Father? I imagine as Paul sat in his jail cell, looking around a dimly lit dirty room...if He wasn't absolutely convinced He was in the will of the Father there's no way he could have found true contentment and peace. If His will truly is my motive for being here orfor doing anything for that matter, than the answer should be yes.
So then why isn't it?
Do I really believe that a new summer dress is going to make me happy? The reality is that since I am not trusting Christ to be the good Shepherd who leads me to green pastures and to still waters and who longs to restore my soul...I cannot be content with being in the will of the Father. Only when I trust His leading and actually let Him lead me, (without holding a grudge) only then will I find the contentment I so desire and desperately need. It's only found in Him.
So today I let go. I open my hands to all that I'm holding on to and trust my Shepherd to lead me and my family. Forgive me Lord for not trusting who I know you to be. For choosing to put my feelings and circumstances above You. For seeking contentment in anything other than your presence.
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Posted with Blogsy
Monday, July 9, 2012
Sabolciu
We haven't really shared much about our time in the gypsy village Sabolciu so we just wanted to share a few photos and tell you a little bit about what it's like out there. Here are pictures of inside their church and a few of the kids...
The Lord has paved the way for us to share the loving gospel of Jesus Christ with a small gypsy village in the Romanian countryside separated from the rest of "civilized" society. We have been given the opportunity to completely facilitate their Sunday church service. When we arrived in Oradea, the two men that were pastoring the church had recently moved on to new ministry opportunities and there was a real lack of leadership in the church.
And that's where we came in...
As we began to go to the church we began to notice that the church was heavily based in Romanian church culture. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it could easily be considered overly religious. Our heart for the people there is to break through the chains of religion and replace it with Biblical teaching, true fellowship, intimacy in prayer and worship.
There are 4 groups of people we desire to reach within the village:
They are truly coming to Christ just as they are.
The Lord has paved the way for us to share the loving gospel of Jesus Christ with a small gypsy village in the Romanian countryside separated from the rest of "civilized" society. We have been given the opportunity to completely facilitate their Sunday church service. When we arrived in Oradea, the two men that were pastoring the church had recently moved on to new ministry opportunities and there was a real lack of leadership in the church.
And that's where we came in...
As we began to go to the church we began to notice that the church was heavily based in Romanian church culture. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it could easily be considered overly religious. Our heart for the people there is to break through the chains of religion and replace it with Biblical teaching, true fellowship, intimacy in prayer and worship.
There are 4 groups of people we desire to reach within the village:
The Children (babies to about 12 yrs old): The children make up the majority of the population of the village and the people who attend church. They are definitely the most interested and the most impressionable but are very wounded and bitter which causes them to be unruly and to have very short fuses which usually result in violence. We have started to teach them short Bible stories and are incorporating prayer into each lesson we teach. As we began to incorporate prayer we were excited to see how hungry they were to actually pray. Please pray that the Lord would restore the purity and youthfulness to the children as well as continuing to open their hearts to receiving Him. Also that they would break free from generational life style patterns and behaviours.
Teenage Boys and Girls: We know that they are in the village but it has been difficult to draw them out. Our hope is to be able to do weekday Bible studies with them separating them into girls groups and boy groups. Please pray that the Lord would draw them out and place a hunger in their hearts for Him.
The Women: They are and will be the backbone of the church and are crucial to the village accepting all that the Lord has for them. There are 7 faithful women who attend church each week and who are truly hungry for the Lord and what He has for them. They love to pray and worship and when they sing it sounds like a well-rehearsed choir. Please pray that the Lord would give them strength to be the light in such a dark place and to not lose heart at what the Lord is doing within the village.
The Men: They are the most influential people in the village and basically control all that happens there. Unfortunately they are the most against the Lord and what He stands for. There are only 1-2 men who will even come to church and the rest choose not to attend because they know the life they are living is against who God is. They are unwilling to forgo the lives they live. They live lives of alcoholism, theft, dishonesty, adultery, and abuse. Please pray that the Lord would break their hearts of stone and give them hearts of flesh because they are the ones who influence the village in the way that they live.
Matt has been given the opportunity to pastor the church by teaching the Bible at their Sunday church services and by praying with the women every week after church. Please pray that the Lord would give us great vision and fresh inspiration to do a new work within the village. We desire to do more outreach with them throughout the week as well as begin regular Bible studies coupled with prayer and worship meetings.
On a funny but sweet side note: the Jesus movement was started with people who came to church without shoes and shirts and who were considered dirty...we are hoping Jesus would move in Sabolciu with naked children and half clothed adults (since summer has officially started we always have a handful of completely naked children in church.)
Teenage Boys and Girls: We know that they are in the village but it has been difficult to draw them out. Our hope is to be able to do weekday Bible studies with them separating them into girls groups and boy groups. Please pray that the Lord would draw them out and place a hunger in their hearts for Him.
The Women: They are and will be the backbone of the church and are crucial to the village accepting all that the Lord has for them. There are 7 faithful women who attend church each week and who are truly hungry for the Lord and what He has for them. They love to pray and worship and when they sing it sounds like a well-rehearsed choir. Please pray that the Lord would give them strength to be the light in such a dark place and to not lose heart at what the Lord is doing within the village.
The Men: They are the most influential people in the village and basically control all that happens there. Unfortunately they are the most against the Lord and what He stands for. There are only 1-2 men who will even come to church and the rest choose not to attend because they know the life they are living is against who God is. They are unwilling to forgo the lives they live. They live lives of alcoholism, theft, dishonesty, adultery, and abuse. Please pray that the Lord would break their hearts of stone and give them hearts of flesh because they are the ones who influence the village in the way that they live.
Matt has been given the opportunity to pastor the church by teaching the Bible at their Sunday church services and by praying with the women every week after church. Please pray that the Lord would give us great vision and fresh inspiration to do a new work within the village. We desire to do more outreach with them throughout the week as well as begin regular Bible studies coupled with prayer and worship meetings.
On a funny but sweet side note: the Jesus movement was started with people who came to church without shoes and shirts and who were considered dirty...we are hoping Jesus would move in Sabolciu with naked children and half clothed adults (since summer has officially started we always have a handful of completely naked children in church.)
They are truly coming to Christ just as they are.
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